Do you ever just feel down in the dumps? Just a wave of sadness washes over you and suddenly all you want to do is sleep all day ? That was me today. I woke up just feeling down in the dumps. I have not been sleeping well, but i think its more then that. My overthinking was just at an all time high today for some reason. Being an over thinker is the worst; I always worry about how other people feel about me, what are they saying? am i being left out? do they really feel how they say they feel? am i making them upset? am i doing this right? are they judging me? do they really not want me? are they making fun of me? The list goes on and on. Over the years i have worked on controlling the overthinking with therapy but some days i just wake up and its there. The mind racing thoughts, the anxiety, the depression; some days i just can’t escape it. Today was one of those days. Had the weirdest dream and it just put me in my feelings. I didn’t hear from my boyfriend for a couple hours and i started thinking does he not miss me? does he no longer care? is he talking to someone else? is he mad at me? did i do something wrong? i literally went crazy in a matter of minutes worrying and overthinking myself nearly to death. I had to smack myself to bring myself back down to reality. I have learned to take the good with the bad days, and today was just a bad day. I worked all day and then once i was done went right to bed and just laid there and you know what that was okay. Sometimes it’s okay to just listen to our bodies and do what our mind and body is asking us to. I never want to give myself enough credit, i always feel lazy if i am just laying around doing nothing. But i have to give myself credit because sometimes all i did was roll out of bed and go to work, and sometimes accomplishing that is enough. Other days i am ready to take over the world, but with everyday comes a balance. Sometimes the scale is tipped more one way then the other but it always balances out in the end.
Remember to give yourself credit, cut yourself some slack today. You are awesome, you are amazing, and know even when the bad days come, the sunshine is never far behind it
August 25, 2020
Written By: Amanda Paige Medina